The problemed family

 

Truths your mother or father should have told you.
 
 Why are so many people still obsessed with  fantasy, romance, divorce,  drugs, alcohol, even TV, movies, sex, pleasure, pornography.. for most of them personally it is an initial lazy,  false escapism approach from the too often real negative aspects of life that we firstly all tend to have, particularly due to our own unrepentant sins and due to  Satan’s buffeting, harassment of them.. the grass may appear greener in the neighbors yard cause you do not know what hardships they are facing now, the supposedly rich persons included. While God for his faithful few give them the grace to endure hardships and even to overcome them, we are all nevertheless bound to have trails and tribulations, hardships, all of us..  Instead of personally first learning how to use the Bible to oppose Satan, obtain peace in their own life, too many persons turn to the flesh.. The problem also  with the common graphic misrepresentation of the pleasure of sex but the reality is that even the Gays, lesbians, adulterers tend to have even more negative consequences, oppressions in their life to force them into deeper bondage with Satan.. Jesus sets us free from all that.
 
(Gal 5:16 KJV)  This I say then, Walk in the Spirit, and ye shall not fulfil the lust of the flesh.
 
(Gal 5:17 KJV)  For the flesh lusteth against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh: and these are contrary the one to the other: so that ye cannot do the things that ye would.
 
(Rom 7:5 KJV)  For when we were in the flesh, the motions of sins, which were by the law, did work in our members to bring forth fruit unto death.
 
(Gal 5:19 KJV)  Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are these; Adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness,
 
(Rom 8:1 KJV)  There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit.
(1 Cor 16:22 KJV)  If any man love not the Lord Jesus Christ, let him be Anathema Maranatha.
 
(1 John 2:15 KJV)  Love not the world, neither the things that are in the world. If any man love the world, the love of the Father is not in him.
 
(John 16:33 KJV)  These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.
 
(John 12:25 KJV)  He that loveth his life shall lose it; and he that hateth his life in this world shall keep it unto life eternal.
 
(1 Tim 6:17 KJV)  Charge them that are rich in this world, that they be not highminded, nor trust in uncertain riches, but in the living God, who giveth us richly all things to enjoy;
 
Whereby are given unto us exceeding great and precious promises: that by these ye might be partakers of the divine nature, having escaped the corruption that is in the world through lust. II Pet. 1:4

Since the beginning of the world men have not heard, nor perceived by the ear, neither hath the eye seen, O God, beside thee, what he hath prepared for him that waiteth for him. Isa. 64:4

Now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known. I Cor. 13:12

Christ . . . shall change our vile body, that it may be fashioned like unto his glorious body, according to the working whereby he is able even to subdue all things unto himself. Phil. 3:20, 21

As for me, I will behold thy face in righteousness: I shall be satisfied, when I awake, with thy likeness. Psa. 17:15
 
(Rom 13:14 KJV)  But put ye on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make not provision for the flesh, to fulfil the lusts thereof.
 
(Gal 6:8 KJV)  For he that soweth to his flesh shall of the flesh reap corruption; but he that soweth to the Spirit shall of the Spirit reap life everlasting.
 
(1 John 2:16 KJV)  For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of the world.
 
(Jude 1:8 KJV)  Likewise also these filthy dreamers defile the flesh, despise dominion, and speak evil of dignities.
 
(Jude 1:23 KJV)  And others save with fear, pulling them out of the fire; hating even the garment spotted by the flesh
 
I had an unexpected opportunity. and one that I was grateful for as well. that involved me praying with a pastor of my church and an other elder for about 40 persons consecutively who had presented to us their personal needs. God answered every single prayer prayed by us immediately, in about 15 cases God he provided the miraculous healing even, and for the balance he God answered the prayers by specifically telling us why he had not answered the prayers, and generally it was cause of the unrepentant sins in the person’s life that we were praying for. It is still true today that God generally will not hear the prayers of a person with unrepentant sins. It next also took me many years to further understand, especially when we hear of common prayer requests being  submitted such as prayers for money, job, healing, divorce, marriage that on the majority of cases these too often similar, repetitious prayers  God would still not immediately, generally answer these prayers too, and  the main reasons actually was because  that these prayer being prayed by the individuals, or made known as prayer requests to others, were for selfish, personal  reasons, and not prayers to help further to minister to others, to glorify God.
 
(James 4:2 KJV)  Ye lust, and have not: ye kill, and desire to have, and cannot obtain: ye fight and war, yet ye have not, because ye ask not. 3 Ye ask, and receive not, because ye ask amiss, that ye may consume it upon your lusts.
 
He died for all, that they which live should not henceforth live unto themselves, but unto him which died for them, and rose again. II Cor. 5:15
 
Hell is real as well.. some people chose to go there on there own free will..
 
(Mat 25:41 KJV)  Then shall he say also unto them on the left hand, Depart from me, ye cursed, into everlasting fire, prepared for the devil and his angels: 42  For I was an hungered, and ye gave me no meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me no drink: 43  I was a stranger, and ye took me not in: naked, and ye clothed me not: sick, and in prison, and ye visited me not. 44  Then shall they also answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungered, or athirst, or a stranger, or naked, or sick, or in prison, and did not minister unto thee? 45  Then shall he answer them, saying, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye did it not to one of the least of these, ye did it not to me. 46  And these shall go away into everlasting punishment: but the righteous into life eternal.
 
Oh that thou wouldest bless me indeed, and that thou wouldest keep me from evil! And God granted him that which he requested. I Chron. 4:10
The blessing of the LORD, it maketh rich, and he addeth no sorrow with it. Prov. 10:22
When he giveth quietness, who then can make trouble? and when he hideth his face, who then can behold him? Job 34:29
Salvation belongeth unto the LORD: thy blessing is upon thy people. Psa. 3:8
How great is thy goodness, which thou hast laid up for them that fear thee; which thou hast wrought for them that trust in thee before the sons of men! Psa. 31:19
I pray not that thou shouldest take them out of the world, but that thou shouldest keep them from the evil. John 17:15

Through the finished work of Jesus Christ, his death on the cross for our sins, Blessed, Peace, Quietness, Deliverance from all evil works,  are just some of the active continual fringe benefits of following after, serving God. These rewards  are all now granted by God to his true children and not by any mere human.

 (Mat 26:41 KJV)  Watch and pray, that ye enter not into temptation: the spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak.
 
(John 6:53 KJV)  Then Jesus said unto them, Verily, verily, I say unto you, Except ye eat the flesh of the Son of man, and drink his blood, ye have no life in you.
 
(John 6:63 KJV)  It is the spirit that quickeneth; the flesh profiteth nothing: the words that I speak unto you, they are spirit, and they are life.
 
(Rom 7:5 KJV)  For when we were in the flesh, the motions of sins, which were by the law, did work in our members to bring forth fruit unto death.
 
(Rom 8:1 KJV)  There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit.
 
(Rom 8:3 KJV)  For what the law could not do, in that it was weak through the flesh, God sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh, and for sin, condemned sin in the flesh:
 
(Rom 8:4 KJV)  That the righteousness of the law might be fulfilled in us, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit.
 
(Rom 8:5 KJV)  For they that are after the flesh do mind the things of the flesh; but they that are after the Spirit the things of the Spirit.
 
(Rom 8:8 KJV)  So then they that are in the flesh cannot please God.
 
(Rom 8:9 KJV)  But ye are not in the flesh, but in the Spirit, if so be that the Spirit of God dwell in you. Now if any man have not the Spirit of Christ, he is none of his.
 
(Rom 8:12 KJV)  Therefore, brethren, we are debtors, not to the flesh, to live after the flesh.
 
(Rom 8:13 KJV)  For if ye live after the flesh, ye shall die: but if ye through the Spirit do mortify the deeds of the body, ye shall live.
 
(Rom 13:14 KJV)  But put ye on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make not provision for the flesh, to fulfil the lusts thereof.
 
(1 Cor 5:5 KJV)  To deliver such an one unto Satan for the destruction of the flesh, that the spirit may be saved in the day of the Lord Jesus.
 
(2 Cor 7:1 KJV)  Having therefore these promises, dearly beloved, let us cleanse ourselves from all filthiness of the flesh and spirit, perfecting holiness in the fear of God.
 
(2 Cor 10:3 KJV)  For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war after the flesh:
 
(2 Cor 12:7 KJV)  And lest I should be exalted above measure through the abundance of the revelations, there was given to me a thorn in the flesh, the messenger of Satan to buffet me, lest I should be exalted above measure.
 
(Gal 2:20 KJV)  I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me.
 
(Gal 3:3 KJV)  Are ye so foolish? having begun in the Spirit, are ye now made perfect by the flesh?
 
(Gal 4:29 KJV)  But as then he that was born after the flesh persecuted him that was born after the Spirit, even so it is now.
 
(Gal 5:13 KJV)  For, brethren, ye have been called unto liberty; only use not liberty for an occasion to the flesh, but by love serve one another.
 
(Gal 5:16 KJV)  This I say then, Walk in the Spirit, and ye shall not fulfil the lust of the flesh.
 
(Gal 5:17 KJV)  For the flesh lusteth against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh: and these are contrary the one to the other: so that ye cannot do the things that ye would.
 
(Gal 5:19 KJV)  Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are these; Adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness,
 
(Gal 5:24 KJV)  And they that are Christ’s have crucified the flesh with the affections and lusts.
 
(Gal 6:8 KJV)  For he that soweth to his flesh shall of the flesh reap corruption; but he that soweth to the Spirit shall of the Spirit reap life everlasting.
 
(Eph 2:3 KJV)  Among whom also we all had our conversation in times past in the lusts of our flesh, fulfilling the desires of the flesh and of the mind; and were by nature the children of wrath, even as others.
(1 Pet 3:18 KJV)  For Christ also hath once suffered for sins, the just for the unjust, that he might bring us to God, being put to death in the flesh, but quickened by the Spirit:
 
(1 Pet 4:1 KJV)  Forasmuch then as Christ hath suffered for us in the flesh, arm yourselves likewise with the same mind: for he that hath suffered in the flesh hath ceased from sin;
 
(1 Pet 4:2 KJV)  That he no longer should live the rest of his time in the flesh to the lusts of men, but to the will of God.
 
(2 Pet 2:10 KJV)  But chiefly them that walk after the flesh in the lust of uncleanness, and despise government. Presumptuous are they, selfwilled, they are not afraid to speak evil of dignities.
 
(2 Pet 2:18 KJV)  For when they speak great swelling words of vanity, they allure through the lusts of the flesh, through much wantonness, those that were clean escaped from them who live in error.
 
(1 John 2:16 KJV)  For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of the world.
 
(1 John 4:2 KJV)  Hereby know ye the Spirit of God: Every spirit that confesseth that Jesus Christ is come in the flesh is of God:
 
(1 John 4:3 KJV)  And every spirit that confesseth not that Jesus Christ is come in the flesh is not of God: and this is that spirit of antichrist, whereof ye have heard that it should come; and even now already is it in the world.
 
(2 John 1:7 KJV)  For many deceivers are entered into the world, who confess not that Jesus Christ is come in the flesh. This is a deceiver and an antichrist.
 
 
To the experience, true Christian believer It is undeniably clearly that  the Holy Sprit is the persons, individual that will lead and guide us into all truth, even explaining the Bible to us now as well..
 
(Psa 31:3 KJV)  For thou art my rock and my fortress; therefore for thy name’s sake lead me, and guide me.
 
(Isa 49:10 KJV)  They shall not hunger nor thirst; neither shall the heat nor sun smite them: for he that hath mercy on them shall lead them, even by the springs of water shall he guide them.
 
(John 14:17 KJV)  Even the Spirit of truth; whom the world cannot receive, because it seeth him not, neither knoweth him: but ye know him; for he dwelleth with you, and shall be in you.
 
(John 15:26 KJV)  But when the Comforter is come, whom I will send unto you from the Father, even the Spirit of truth, which proceedeth from the Father, he shall testify of me:
 
(John 16:13 KJV)  Howbeit when he, the Spirit of truth, is come, he will guide you into all truth: for he shall not speak of himself; but whatsoever he shall hear, that shall he speak: and he will show you things to come.
 
(1 John 4:6 KJV)  We are of God: he that knoweth God heareth us; he that is not of God heareth not us. Hereby know we the spirit of truth, and the spirit of error.
 
We all still  CONTINUALY DO NEED TO  trust the Holy Spirit as the main Teacher given by God to interret and to make His word clearer to us.
 
“God then began to show me that the word of God alone is our standard of judgment in spiritual things; that it can be explained only by the Holy Spirit; and that in our day, as well as in former times.  He is the Teacher of His people.  The office of the Holy Spirit I had not experimentally understood before that time. It was my beginning to understand this latter point in particular, which had a great effect on me; for the Lord enabled me to put it to the test of experience, by laying aside commentaries, and almost every other book and simply reading the word  of God and studying it. I learned more in a few hours than I had done during a period of several months previously.”  George Müller (1805-1898)  http://www.ccel.org/ccel/murray/prayer.XXXII.html
 
(Heb 10:19 KJV)  Having therefore, brethren, boldness to enter into the holiest by the blood of Jesus, 20  By a new and living way, which he hath consecrated for us, through the veil, that is to say, his flesh; 21  And having an high priest over the house of God; 22 Let us draw near with a true heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled from an evil conscience, and our bodies washed with pure water.
 
Jesus: (Rev 1:18 KJV)  I am he that liveth, and was dead; and, behold, I am alive for evermore, Amen; and have the keys of hell and of death.
 
(Rev 2:5 KJV)  Remember therefore from whence thou art fallen, and repent, and do the first works; or else I will come unto thee quickly, and will remove thy candlestick out of his place, except thou repent.
 
(Rev 14:8 KJV)  And there followed another angel, saying, Babylon is fallen, is fallen, that great city, because she made all nations drink of the wine of the wrath of her fornication.
 
(Rev 18:2 KJV)  And he cried mightily with a strong voice, saying, Babylon the great is fallen, is fallen, and is become the habitation of devils, and the hold of every foul spirit, and a cage of every unclean and hateful bird.
 
Jesus: (Mat 11:28 KJV)  Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. 29 Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. 30  For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.
 
(Rev 3:20 KJV)  Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hear my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me. 21  To him that overcometh will I grant to sit with me in my throne, even as I also overcame, and am set down with my Father in his throne. 22 He that hath an ear, let him hear what the Spirit saith unto the churches.
 
We all are told to come to Jesus directly..
 
http://groups.msn.com/HolySpiritCome
 
George Müller (1805-1898)  was a Prussian-born English  exemplary Christian man of faith and prayer, he established orphanages in Bristol and founded the Scriptural Knowledge Institution for Home and abroad.
 
“No Salary for George George Mueller had joyfully dedicated his “whole life to the object of exemplifying how much may be accomplished by prayer and faith.” When he had moved to Bristol in 1832 to take the pulpit of Gideon chapel, he and his wife Mary decided not to accept a salary from the congregation. They wanted to daily depend upon the Lord for their needs, and they accepted only unsolicited freewill offerings. Mueller’s journal is full of the amazing ways the Lord directed funds to them throughout his sixty-six years of ministry.”
 
“At Bristol, Mueller began reading a biography of a great leader of the “Pietism” movement, A. H. . Francke, who had founded an orphan house at Halle in 1696. Francke’s orphanage became the largest enterprise for orphans then existing in the world, and he had trusted in God for every provision. As Mueller began to work with the poor in Bristol, he too wanted to trust the Lord and bring every need to Him in prayer.”
 
George Mueller throughout most of his personal life he  freely received from God and he also continually freely gave as well, expecting nothing in return, he did not sell anything for money or make requests of anyone for money. He lived by a real, practicing faith in God and not in man.. totally unlike most of the bad monetary, commercialized pastors, evangelists today.  Though much money had passed through his hands he George Mueller did not accumulate any wealth for himself. “It ill becomes the servant to seek to be rich, and great, and honoured in that world where his Lord was poor, and mean, and despised. – George Mueller. Ironically and hypocritically  most of the people who today do even promote this basic exemplary Christian way of life, wrongfully contradict the example of the Christian George Mueller by their own wrongful begging, asking for money, commercialization of the Gospel of Jesus Christ
 
“Faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen. Through faith we understand that the worlds were framed by the Word of God, so that things which are seen were not made of things which do appear” (Hebrews 11:1).

FIRST: WHAT IS FAITH? In the simplest manner in which I am able to express it, I answer: Faith is the assurance that the thing which God has said in His Word is true, and that God will act according to what He has said in His Word. This assurance, this reliance on God’s Word, this confidence is FAITH.

NO IMPRESSIONS ARE TO BE TAKEN IN CONNECTION WITH FAITH. Impressions have neither one thing nor the other to do with faith. Faith has to do with the Word of God. It is not impressions, strong or weak, which will make any difference. We have to do with the written Word and not ourselves or our impressions.

PROBABILITIES ARE NOT TO BE TAKEN INTO ACCOUNT. Many people are willing to believe regarding those things that seem probable to them. Faith has nothing to do with probabilities. The province of FAITH begins where probabilities cease and sight and sense fail. A great many of God’s children are cast down and lament their want of Faith. They write to me and say that they have no impressions, no feeling, they see no probability that the thing they wish will come to pass. APPEARANCES ARE NOT TO BE TAKEN INTO ACCOUNT. The question is – whether God has spoken it in His Word.

And now, beloved Christian friends, you are in great need to ask yourselves whether you are in the habit of thus confiding, in your inmost soul, in what God has said, and whether you are in earnest in seeking to find whether the thing you want is in accordance with what He has said in His Word.

SECOND: HOW FAITH MAY BE INCREASED. God delights to increase the Faith of His children. Our Faith which is feeble at first, is developed and strengthened more and more by us. We ought, instead of wanting no trials before victory, no exercise for patience, to be willing to take them from God’s hand as a means. I say – and say it deliberately – trials, obstacles, difficulties, and sometimes defeats, are the very food of Faith. I get letters from so many of God’s dear children who say: “Dear Brother Mueller, I’m writing this because I am so weak in faith.” Just so surely as we ask to have our Faith strengthened, we must feel a willingness to take from God’s hand the means for strengthening it. We must allow Him to educate us through trials and bereavements and troubles. It is through trials that Faith is exercised and developed more and more. God affectionately permits difficulties, that He may develop unceasingly that which He is willing to do for us, and to this end we should not shrink, but if He gives us sorrow and hindrances and losses and afflictions, we should take them out of His hands as evidences of His love and care for us in developing more and more that Faith which He is seeking to strengthen in us.

The Church of God is not aroused to see God as the beautiful and lovable One He is, and hence the littleness of blessedness. Oh, beloved brothers and sisters in Christ, seek to learn for yourselves, for I cannot tell you the blessedness! In the darkest moments I am able to confide in Him, for I know what a beautiful and kind and lovable Being He is, and, if it be the will of God to put us in the furnace, let Him do it, that so we may acquaint ourselves with Him as He will reveal Himself, and that we may know Him better. We come then to the conclusion that God is a lovable Being, and we are satisfied with Him, and say: “It is my Father, let Him do as He pleases.”

When I first began to allow God to deal with me, relying on Him, taking Him at His Word, and set out fifty years ago simply relying on Him for myself, family, taxes, travelling expenses and every other need, I rested on the simple promises I found in the sixth chapter of Matthew. Read Matthew 6:25-34 carefully. I believed the Word, I rested on it and practiced it. I took God at His word. A stranger, a foreigner in England, I knew seven languages and might have used them perhaps as a means of remunerative employment but I had consecrated myself to labor for the Lord, I put my reliance in the God who has promised, and He has acted according to His Word. I’ve lacked nothing – nothing. I have had my trials, my difficulties, and my purse empty, but my receipts have aggregated thousands of dollars, while the work has gone on these 51 years. Then, with regard to my pastoral work; for the past 51 years I have had great difficulties, great trials and perplexities. There will always be difficulties, always trials. But God has sustained me under them and delivered me out of them, and the work has gone on. Now, this is not, as some have said, because I am a man of great mental power, or endowed with energy and perseverance – these are not the reasons. It is because I have confided in God; because I have sought God, and He has cared for the Institution, which, under His direction, has 100 schools, with masters and mistresses and other departments which I have told you before.

I do not carry the burden. And now in my 67th year, I have physical strength and mental vigor for as much work as when I was a young man in the university, studying and preparing Latin orations. I am just as vigorous as at that time. How comes this? Because in the last half century of labor I’ve been able, with the simplicity of a child, to rely upon God. I have had my trials, but I have laid hold upon God, and so it has come to pass that I have been sustained. It is not only permission, but positive command that He gives, to cast the burdens upon Him. Oh, let us do it! My beloved brothers and sisters in Christ, “Cast thy burden upon the Lord and He shall sustain thee.” Day by day I do it. This morning sixty matters in connection with the church of which I am pastor, I brought before the Lord, and thus it is, day by day I do it, and year by year; ten years, thirty years, forty years. Do not, however, expect to obtain full Faith at once. All such things as jumping into full exercise of Faith in such things I discountenance. I do not believe in it. All such things go on in a natural way. The little I did obtain, I did not obtain all at once. All this I say particularly, because letters come to me full of questions from those who seek to have their Faith strengthened. Begin over again, staying your soul on the Word of God, and you will have an increase of your Faith as you exercise it.

One thing more. Some say, “Oh, I shall never have the gift of Faith Mr. Mueller has got.” This is a mistake – it is the greatest error – there is not a particle of truth in it. My Faith is the same kind of Faith that all of God’s children have had. It is the same kind that Simon Peter had, and all Christians may obtain the like Faith. My Faith is their Faith, though there may be more of it because my Faith has been a little more developed by exercise then theirs; but their Faith is precisely the Faith I exercise, only, with regard to degree, mine may be more strongly exercised. Now, my beloved brothers and sisters, begin in a little way.

At first I was able to trust the Lord for ten dollars, then for a hundred dollars, then for a thousand dollars, and now, with the greatest ease, I could trust Him for a million dollars, if there was occasion. But first, I should quietly, carefully, deliberately examine and see whether what I was trusting for, was something in accordance with His promises in His written Word.

“As laborers together with Him” (2 Corinthians 6:1).

Read more about George Mueller on  http://www.oldtruth.com/blog.cfm/id.2.pid.94
http://www.whatsaiththescripture.com/Voice/George.Mueller.of.Bristol/George.Mueller.Bristol.18.html
http://www.ccel.org/ccel/murray/prayer.XXXII.html

George Mueller has proved to the world the truth of Philippians 4:19.  But my God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus. Three weeks after his marriage, he and his wife decided to depend on God alone to supply their needs–never again to approach people about them.  Now he felt led to relinquish his small salary as a preacher completely.  Wishing that all support be spontaneous, he put a box in the chapel for his needs; determining never to run into debt, and to get his needs supplied only by requests to God Himself.  This was October, 1830.  When he died, in March 1898, 68 years later, he had obtained from God more than any one else who ever lived–seven and a half million dollars . Mueller read the Bible through over 200 times, half of these times on his knees.  He said he knew of some 50,000 specific answers to prayer…requests to God alone!
 http://www.uvm.edu/~sbross/biography/muller.txt 
 
Please see also George Muller, and the Secret of his Power in Prayer
http://www.ccel.org/ccel/murray/prayer.XXXII.html
 
(Phil 3:9 KJV)  And be found in him, not having mine own righteousness, which is of the law, but that which is through the faith of Christ, the righteousness which is of God by faith:

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Deliberate unforgiveness

In decades now I have rarely heard of Deliberate unforgiveness being mentioned as a basic cause of divorce or of  the ongoing marital problems.. and yet it   undeniably is..  

I am sure even you have heard of bitter, unfriendly divorces where spouses refused to talk to each even decades later, and yet I am certain that in these very same cases wrongful Deliberate unforgiveness was a basic cause of the same divorce..
 
There is still also conditional forgiveness, and unconditional forgiveness too..

Our Unconditional forgiveness is when we choose to accept all the past  negative consequences due to the other person’s bad acts  and to merely forgive the same person fully anyway… and we decide also at the same time not pursue a course of personal vengeance in the matter. Rather we ascribe  to God’s own related acts of venegeance fully next in the same matter.

Then there is the conditional forgiveness where we are willing to forgive the persons solely firstly if they do admit their wrongs, sins, repent of them and ask for our forgiveness and agree to the appropriate punishment terms..

Now there for sure that some things cannot be merely next unconditionally forgiven.. such as when one spouse continues to cheat, lies, steal, commit adultery..

The type of forgiveness  and related consequences may depend on whether the offending person  knew what he or she was doing was wrong now too.. and how sincere, quckly they had now repented too, even if they had dones so on their own too.

Even Unforgiveness can still have negative consequences on both parties even as well.. it for sure can cause a lot of personal stress, bitterness, wasted energies too on the offended party in addition to the harm already done.

When can I forgive, and when can I not forgive someone? may also depend on how big of price are you willing now to pay next for doing so? or not doing so?

If you don’t forgive those who have sinned against you, it is very probable that you will suffer some health problems. If you carry around a grudge it will stress your immune system to the point you can develop everything from cancer to a common cold. THAT’S A FACT! Therefore, if it is possible and does not violate another’s rights – forgive and forget. It is best for you?
 
(1 Tim 5:20 KJV)  Them that sin rebuke before all, that others also may fear.(1 Tim 5:21 KJV)  I charge thee before God, and the Lord Jesus Christ, and the elect angels, that thou observe these things without preferring one before another, doing nothing by partiality.
 
(Rev 3:19 KJV)  As many as I love, I rebuke and chasten: be zealous therefore, and repent.
 
Everyone has been wronged, offended, and had even sinned against  some one at some point in life. How are we to respond when such offenses occur? According to some fundamentals who say, or are they going overboard with this too?  they say that the Bible commands that we are to unconditionally forgive others, we now are to forgive everyone. Ephesians 4:32 declares, “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” Similarly, Colossians 3:13 proclaims, “Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.” The key in both Scriptures of these isolated verse of course  neglecting any others is that we are to forgive others, as God has forgiven us. It is also understood that a brother has repented, is sorry for their wrongdoings?
 
Why do we forgive? Because we have been forgiven! But is that necessary so? God himself does not forgive us for all of our sins automatically, his conditions for forgiveness needs to be still met according to the same Bible..
 
 I am rightfully  inclined also to believe you don’t always have the right to forgive a person who has not repented themselves  for God will not hear your prayer on the matter – that act may even be a sin against God – – for you to misuse your authority in this manner may be an unacceptable sin.  
 
(John 5:14 KJV)  Afterward Jesus findeth him in the temple, and said unto him, Behold, thou art made whole: sin no more, lest a worse thing come unto thee.
 
(John 8:10 KJV)  When Jesus had lifted up himself, and saw none but the woman, he said unto her, Woman, where are those thine accusers? hath no man condemned thee? 11 She said, No man, Lord. And Jesus said unto her, Neither do I condemn thee: go, and sin no more.
 
(Mat 18:15 KJV)  Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother.
 
(Luke 17:3 KJV)  Take heed to yourselves: If thy brother trespass against thee, rebuke him; and if he repent, forgive him.
 
(Mark 11:25 KJV)  And when ye stand praying, forgive, if ye have ought against any: that your Father also which is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses.
 
(Mat 6:12 KJV)  And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors.
 
(Mat 6:14 KJV)  For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you:15  But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.
 
(Mat 18:21 KJV)  Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times? (Luke 17:4 KJV)  And if he trespass against thee seven times in a day, and seven times in a day turn again to thee, saying, I repent; thou shalt forgive him.
 
(Mat 18:35 KJV)  So likewise shall my heavenly Father do also unto you, if ye from your hearts forgive not every one his brother their trespasses.
 
(Luke 6:37 KJV)  Judge not, and ye shall not be judged: condemn not, and ye shall not be condemned: forgive, and ye shall be forgiven:
 
(Luke 23:34 KJV)  Then said Jesus, Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do. And they parted his raiment, and cast lots.
 
(2 Cor 2:7 KJV)  So that contrariwise ye ought rather to forgive him, and comfort him, lest perhaps such a one should be swallowed up with overmuch sorrow.
 
(2 Cor 2:10 KJV)  To whom ye forgive any thing, I forgive also: for if I forgave any thing, to whom I forgave it, for your sakes forgave I it in the person of Christ; 

(1 John 1:9 KJV)  If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.
   
(Gal 6:7 KJV)  Be not deceived; God is not mocked: for whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap. 8  For he that soweth to his flesh shall of the flesh reap corruption; but he that soweth to the Spirit shall of the Spirit reap life everlasting.
 
(Heb 12:4 KJV)  Ye have not yet resisted unto blood, striving against sin. 5  And ye have forgotten the exhortation which speaketh unto you as unto children, My son, despise not thou the chastening of the Lord, nor faint when thou art rebuked of him:  6  For whom the Lord loveth he chasteneth, and scourgeth every son whom he receiveth. 7  If ye endure chastening, God dealeth with you as with sons; for what son is he whom the father chasteneth not? 8  But if ye be without chastisement, whereof all are partakers, then are ye bastards, and not sons. 9  Furthermore we have had fathers of our flesh which corrected us, and we gave them reverence: shall we not much rather be in subjection unto the Father of spirits, and live? 10  For they verily for a few days chastened us after their own pleasure; but he for our profit, that we might be partakers of his holiness. 11  Now no chastening for the present seemeth to be joyous, but grievous: nevertheless afterward it yieldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousness unto them which are exercised thereby. 12  Wherefore lift up the hands which hang down, and the feeble knees; 13  And make straight paths for your feet, lest that which is lame be turned out of the way; but let it rather be healed. 

(1 John 5:16 KJV)  If any man see his brother sin a sin which is not unto death, he shall ask, and he shall give him life for them that sin not unto death. There is a sin unto death: I do not say that he shall pray for it.
 
(1 John 5:17 KJV)  All unrighteousness is sin: and there is a sin not unto death.
 
(Mat 9:6 KJV)  But that ye may know that the Son of man hath power on earth to forgive sins, (then saith he to the sick of the palsy,) Arise, take up thy bed, and go unto thine house.
 
(Deu 32:35 KJV)  To me belongeth vengeance, and recompense; their foot shall slide in due time: for the day of their calamity is at hand, and the things that shall come upon them make haste.
 
(Deu 32:41 KJV)  If I whet my glittering sword, and mine hand take hold on judgment; I will render vengeance to mine enemies, and will reward them that hate me.
 
(Deu 32:43 KJV)  Rejoice, O ye nations, with his people: for he will avenge the blood of his servants, and will render vengeance to his adversaries, and will be merciful unto his land, and to his people.
 
(Psa 58:10 KJV)  The righteous shall rejoice when he seeth the vengeance: he shall wash his feet in the blood of the wicked.
 
(Psa 94:1 KJV)  O LORD God, to whom vengeance belongeth; O God, to whom vengeance belongeth, show thyself.
 
(Psa 99:8 KJV)  Thou answeredst them, O LORD our God: thou wast a God that forgavest them, though thou tookest vengeance of their inventions.
 
(Psa 149:7 KJV)  To execute vengeance upon the heathen, and punishments upon the people;
 
(Prov 6:34 KJV)  For jealousy is the rage of a man: therefore he will not spare in the day of vengeance.
 
(Isa 34:8 KJV)  For it is the day of the Lord’s vengeance, and the year of recompenses for the controversy of Zion.
 
(Isa 35:4 KJV)  Say to them that are of a fearful heart, Be strong, fear not: behold, your God will come with vengeance, even God with a recompense; he will come and save you.
 
(Isa 47:3 KJV)  Thy nakedness shall be uncovered, yea, thy shame shall be seen: I will take vengeance, and I will not meet thee as a man.
 
(Isa 59:17 KJV)  For he put on righteousness as a breastplate, and an helmet of salvation upon his head; and he put on the garments of vengeance for clothing, and was clad with zeal as a cloak.
 
(Isa 61:2 KJV)  To proclaim the acceptable year of the LORD, and the day of vengeance of our God; to comfort all that mourn;
 
(Isa 63:4 KJV)  For the day of vengeance is in mine heart, and the year of my redeemed is come.
 
(Jer 20:12 KJV)  But, O LORD of hosts, that triest the righteous, and seest the reins and the heart, let me see thy vengeance on them: for unto thee have I opened my cause.
 
(Jer 46:10 KJV)  For this is the day of the Lord GOD of hosts, a day of vengeance, that he may avenge him of his adversaries: and the sword shall devour, and it shall be satiate and made drunk with their blood: for the Lord GOD of hosts hath a sacrifice in the north country by the river Euphrates.
 
(Jer 50:15 KJV)  Shout against her round about: she hath given her hand: her foundations are fallen, her walls are thrown down: for it is the vengeance of the LORD: take vengeance upon her; as she hath done, do unto her.
 
(Jer 50:28 KJV)  The voice of them that flee and escape out of the land of Babylon, to declare in Zion the vengeance of the LORD our God, the vengeance of his temple.
 
(Jer 51:6 KJV)  Flee out of the midst of Babylon, and deliver every man his soul: be not cut off in her iniquity; for this is the time of the LORD’S vengeance; he will render unto her a recompense.
 
(Jer 51:36 KJV)  Therefore thus saith the LORD; Behold, I will plead thy cause, and take vengeance for thee; and I will dry up her sea, and make her springs dry.
 
(Ezek 25:14 KJV)  And I will lay my vengeance upon Edom by the hand of my people Israel: and they shall do in Edom according to mine anger and according to my fury; and they shall know my vengeance, saith the Lord GOD.
 
(Ezek 25:15 KJV)  Thus saith the Lord GOD; Because the Philistines have dealt by revenge, and have taken vengeance with a despiteful heart, to destroy it for the old hatred;
 
(Ezek 25:17 KJV)  And I will execute great vengeance upon them with furious rebukes; and they shall know that I am the LORD, when I shall lay my vengeance upon them.
 
(Micah 5:15 KJV)  And I will execute vengeance in anger and fury upon the heathen, such as they have not heard.
 
(Nahum 1:2 KJV)  God is jealous, and the LORD revengeth; the LORD revengeth, and is furious; the LORD will take vengeance on his adversaries, and he reserveth wrath for his enemies.
 
(Luke 21:22 KJV)  For these be the days of vengeance, that all things which are written may be fulfilled.
 
(Rom 3:5 KJV)   Is God unrighteous who taketh vengeance?
 
(Rom 12:19 KJV)  Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord.
 
(2 Th 1:8 KJV)  In flaming fire taking vengeance on them that know not God, and that obey not the gospel of our Lord Jesus Christ:
 
(Heb 10:30 KJV)  For we know him that hath said, Vengeance belongeth unto me, I will recompense, saith the Lord. And again, The Lord shall judge his people.
 
(Jude 1:7 KJV)  Even as Sodom and Gomorrha, and the cities about them in like manner, giving themselves over to fornication, and going after strange flesh, are set forth for an example, suffering the vengeance of eternal fire.
 
When I hear too often the mostly poor Biblical theology coming out of many person’s mouth even these days, I know that they are clearly not only ignorant of God’s words in the Bible, and they have not been mediating on it as well but I also tend to know they are still not Holy Spirit filled or led too.
 
Anyone Forgiving someone does still  not tend to remove possible negative consequences upon that persons, for after all they still need to ask for and accept God’s forgiveness and resulting positive consequences.. God tends to forgive but that does not mean he still may no prescribe some appropriate negative pushiest, consequences as a deterrent to stop from sinning again too.. for those who God loves
 
(Psa 39:11 KJV)  When thou with rebukes dost correct man for iniquity, thou makest his beauty to consume away like a moth: surely every man is vanity. Selah.
 
(Psa 94:10 KJV)  He that chastiseth the heathen, shall not he correct? he that teacheth man knowledge, shall not he know?
 
(Jer 2:19 KJV)  Thine own wickedness shall correct thee, and thy backslidings shall reprove thee: know therefore and see that it is an evil thing and bitter, that thou hast forsaken the LORD thy God, and that my fear is not in thee, saith the Lord GOD of hosts.
 
(Jer 10:24 KJV)  O LORD, correct me, but with judgment; not in thine anger, lest thou bring me to nothing.
 
(Jer 30:11 KJV)  For I am with thee, saith the LORD, to save thee: though I make a full end of all nations whither I have scattered thee, yet will I not make a full end of thee: but I will correct thee in measure, and will not leave thee altogether unpunished.
 
(2 Sam 7:14 KJV)  I will be his father, and he shall be my son. If he commit iniquity, I will chasten him with the rod of men, and with the stripes of the children of men:
 
(Psa 6:1 KJV)   O LORD, rebuke me not in thine anger, neither chasten me in thy hot displeasure. 
 
(Prov 19:18 KJV)  Chasten thy son while there is hope, and let not thy soul spare for his crying.
 
(Dan 10:12 KJV)  Then said he unto me, Fear not, Daniel: for from the first day that thou didst set thine heart to understand, and to chasten thyself before thy God, thy words were heard, and I am come for thy words.
 
(Rev 3:19 KJV)  As many as I love, I rebuke and chasten: be zealous therefore, and repent. 

 

Find out also how to receive full unconditional  pardon from God now for your own sins,  a full  forgiveness for your sins, by the paid penalty for the sins through the shed innocent blood of Jesus Christ the Messiah. You cannot earn it, it is free by faith in Him. The Bible says God accepts us on the basis of what He did, not on the basis of what we try to do. We can’t “pay” for God’s forgiveness by working harder or serving more fervently. King David was  a murderer and an adulterer too who found forgiveness from God!     http://beauty4ashes.org/salvation/salvation.html

More about Control freaks. Fears too.

Control freaks do often have a terrible personal, social  life too and do often make all life terrible for those they live with, marry, work with, come in contact with.
 
Now Graphics, arts and photography have been hobbies of mine for decades, so it should not come as a surprise to my friends, neighbors, others to see me taking digital pictures, including scenery, trees, flowers..  http://picasaweb.google.com/thenonconformer  
 
but I am often amazed how many times I have seen housewives  objectionably running out of their  front door with a phone in their hand ready to call police because they saw that I was on the sidewalk taking a picture of their tree, shrub, flower in their yard.. these are also the evidently control freaks.. these people who manifest Psychological Disorders or Abnormal Behavior, showing  a personal behavior that is either deviant, maladaptive, or personally distressful. Meaning they likely need real, valid professional help. Includes now also their having  an  “abnormal thought processes”.
 
 It is like the line from Simon and Garfunkels’ song, The Boxer: where ” a man hears what he wants to hear . And disregards the rest.” and the sick ladies had openly screamed to me, you are crazy, no person in his right mind now takes pictures of flowers, you have an alternative agenda.. clearly this showing now yes they have lost it..  sadly lost touch with reality.
  
Control freaks are very likely the often very close to you people who are too often personally afraid and are desperately now trying to manipulate others and their environments to minimize their own fears, all now mostly done  likely still out of reality, motivated by often their  false fears now too.  They are the often Fear-driven persons who question and complain to all others unless every task is done by others as they want it too be done, practical or not, to the full satisfaction of their own selfish needs, desires which much always come first. Do they feel guilty living such a clearly selfish, self centered life.. now, not openly and explains why they tend to behave so crazy like too. Covering up for them, falsely denying who they are  is also still  an act of the other crazy people now too.
 
These control freaks their sad present development it  now have too often been a long time in the making now, for they did not arrive  to this disturbed state of mind likely even over night. Their clear need to control others is almost always still mostly  fueled by their ongoing selfishness, self centeredness, anxiety, personal fears, and  imaginary ones mostly too, Such as the suspicious persons questioning my motives for taking pictures of flowers. I now have learned to take time to smell the roses and to enjoy them. They sadly now  have not.. 
 
but the control freaks wrongfully seldom recognize any of their negative behaviors, acts so  never mind next openly even now admitting their own motivation fears. Which leads to the question can there be next hope for them.. unlikely…
  
Unresolved Fear, anxiety can  lead  next to some people with ‘liveable’ responses but with others it leads them to a deeply disabled, disturbed responses, a long lasting, permanently disturbed mind and life. Excessive anxiety and fear are factors in some common personal emotional and physical illnesses causing extreme self-focus and apprehension. 
  
Their own  lives, views, expressions, words  are also characterized by them too often falsely listening to other’s  lies, gossip, slanders,  exaggerations,  distortions of reality too. Clearly they are some of the  People who have lost the fundamental grasp of truths and reality it seems. Sick, sick persons  who have   turned inward, defending themselves from their anxiety and usually hiding  from real life in general.So instead of embracing all activities as a challenge where unexpected, difficult  things are anticipated with pleasure and the person is open to new experience, rather now many activities are solely come to be seen as a potential threat and are looked at with suspicion and fearful anticipation; and a happy life for them falsely begins to close down.
 
Disregard simply their demands always and do not give into them, for it will wrongfully reinforce that they were right about their too often still unfounded fears rather too.. 
 
And  most people try hard to avoid the Control freaks, by desperately trying to have nothing to do with them in case these supposedly crazies next go berserk and do something stupid, violent, embarrassing next.. for this fear motivation that  the control freaks   they tend to have is not at all healthy or normal.Do readily now Tell them to get help, and the sooner the better,  to deal with their much too many fears due often to their personal  unresolved guilt,  and/or fears of negative resulting possible consequences, or the fear of dying, getting hurt, being fired, mugged, becoming poor,  or whatever..
 
Non physically handicapped person suffering  from considerable feelings of guilt, from considerable feelings of inadequacy is   now so obvious a reality in real life  for them too. 
The control minded Sickness, Illness can likely rightfully often be associated with the persons own past actual   bad acts, unresolved moral guilt in their own contemporary minds and their subsequent behavior now seen as  related punishment for their own past, unconfessed, unrepented of moral wrongdoings that can,  does come forth  and so such association of cause and effect can really still exists for them as well(1 Th 4:7 KJV)  For God hath not called us unto uncleanness, but unto holiness.(1 Th 5:9 KJV)  For God hath not appointed us to wrath, but to obtain salvation by our Lord Jesus Christ,(2 Tim 1:7 KJV)  For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.See also http://postedat.wordpress.com/2008/07/07/control-freaks/ 
 
You may also seriously want to look more into why some people personally  tend to have a large, a false amount of guilt, phobias, unresolved genuine fears too.
 
Have you ever felt guilty? Of course you have, usually because you were indeed guilty. But not always!
 
Phobia. [Gr. phobos, fear.] any persistent, irrational, and excessive fear of some particular thing or situation. (Webster’s New Universal Unabridged Dictionary, 1983 Many People who have struggled with phobias understand how immune such phobias where even the irrational fears continue to plague the victim.
 
Many “People with low self-esteem experience a high degree of insecurity and jeopardy. They do not feel safe most of the time. One defense is to become a perfectionist. After all if you do something perfectly, you are beyond criticism and no one can hurt you. Perfectionism is an attempt to create perfect safety (which is, needless to say, unattainable). The other safety attempt is to become a control freak and try to control everything. If we can control everything, nothing will ever jump up and surprise or hurt us. 
 
 People with low self-esteem tend to live in a closed system that is hard to break. Because they have difficulty admitting negatives, either about themselves or their behavior, it is hard to reach them. It is especially difficult for someone with low self-esteem who is defensive or in denial to admit that they are afraid. As a result, it is difficult, occasionally impossible, to reassure them that it is okay to be afraid or to be in pain. Their major fear is that it is all their fault. That’s a lie. It is not all their fault, but it’s a lie that’s hard to surrender.”   http://www.getnewvisions.com/se/03crse_symptoms.html
 
People who are doing wrong, doing their own thing without God rightfully still do need to feel guilty about they wrongs they are doing too. Believe it or not if you continually cheat, lie, steal, commit adultery, tell lies, do bad things, etc you will subconsciously even feel bad about yourself and have a very low self esteem too and often falsely try  to compensate the void by the false counterfeits still of power, control, more lusts, money etc., to no permanent avail too
 
But what about those times when you have feelings of guilt even when you didn’t do anything wrong?
 
Some people say that “Usually a person driven by false guilt is afraid of freedom because in every act of freedom is the possibility of offending someone. Offending someone is unacceptable. Other people are seen as pipelines of approval. If they’re offended, the pipeline shuts down.” Maybe you feel guilty cause you have been lazy and did not much good too? so you feel this void in your own life?see also http://www.anxietycare.org.uk/docs/agoraphobia.asp
 
and there is also the genuine and also the false religious fears now too..”Relatively little attention is given by many of us  to religious fears, however. It is apparent that manipulative minds can readily distort the scriptures in order to produce feelings of fear, guilt, remorse and even hysteria. The followers of Jim Jones and Ayatollah Khomeini can attest to that. What is surprising is that often the victims are aware of their paranoia and know it to be destructive, but feel powerless to overcome it. ” http://www.freeminds.org/psych/phobias.htmNow if something you are doing makes you feel really bad, first do find out why and maybe stop doing it too. Or maybe not! Don’t take the false blame for another persons fault, sickness, sin.

For being nice. kind, friendly to a really bad person is still also a complete waste of time, for they will not change their negative behaviors on their own, they see no reasons to do so now still too. Sad but true.

We cannot never control a bad person, a drug addict or an alcoholic, but we can learn all about it and learn firstly to control our own behavior, appropriate responses –including how we should behave in the relationship with the sick and suffering and /or possibly manipulative addict or alcoholic, abuser OR THESE pretentious persons..

Public exposure and prosecution of the guilty persons seems to be most effective way that works for everyone’s benefit in dealing with the bad acts of others still.

 

 (Job 28:28 KJV)  And unto man he said, Behold, the fear of the Lord, that is wisdom; and to depart from evil is understanding.

(2 Chr 19:7 KJV)  Wherefore now let the fear of the LORD be upon you; take heed and do it: for there is no iniquity with the LORD our God, nor respect of persons, nor taking of gifts

(Psa 19:9 KJV)  The fear of the LORD is clean, enduring for ever: the judgments of the LORD are true and righteous altogether.

(Psa 34:11 KJV)  Come, ye children, hearken unto me: I will teach you the fear of the LORD.

(Psa 111:10 KJV)  The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom: a good understanding have all they that do his commandments: his praise endureth for ever.

(Prov 1:7 KJV)  The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge: but fools despise wisdom and instruction.

(Prov 1:29 KJV)  For that they hated knowledge, and did not choose the fear of the LORD:

(Prov 8:13 KJV)  The fear of the LORD is to hate evil: pride, and arrogancy, and the evil way, and the froward mouth, do I hate.

(Prov 9:10 KJV)  The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom: and the knowledge of the holy is understanding.

(Prov 10:27 KJV)  The fear of the LORD prolongeth days: but the years of the wicked shall be shortened.

(Prov 14:27 KJV)  The fear of the LORD is a fountain of life, to depart from the snares of death.

(Prov 15:16 KJV)  Better is little with the fear of the LORD than great treasure and trouble therewith.

(Prov 15:33 KJV)  The fear of the LORD is the instruction of wisdom; and before honour is humility.

(Prov 19:23 KJV)  The fear of the LORD tendeth to life: and he that hath it shall abide satisfied; he shall not be visited with evil.

(Prov 23:17 KJV)  Let not thine heart envy sinners: but be thou in the fear of the LORD all the day long.

(Isa 33:6 KJV)  And wisdom and knowledge shall be the stability of thy times, and strength of salvation: the fear of the LORD is his treasure.

(Acts 9:31 KJV)  Then had the churches rest throughout all Judaea and Galilee and Samaria, and were edified; and walking in the fear of the Lord, and in the comfort of the Holy Ghost, were multiplied.  

now that all should be adequate food for thought..

I believe in all things work for the best for those who love God, but I rebuke all evil persons rightfully still.. I do not accept rightfully their abuse of others. Here is my reality.. Control freaks are demonic persons, led by the devil, who try to bring us into bondage, and they tend to  get a lot more crazy, get a lot worse..

 

 

I really often do try to learn from the many diverse experiences I encounter in life, to be able to deal with them more effectively and to be able to help, share more simply with any others even the solutions as well as to what I have experienced  and what I have learned now as well..   http://redreadingroom.blogspot.com/2008/01/intro.html 
 
I do not have to accept any of the negative consequences, or bad acts of other persons  and their sins too. That includes their verbal abuse, physical abuse, slander, lies, emotional abuses, their false silent treatment too now. etc.. I can even tell them that now too. 

 

I still am often amazed how many control freaks I do encounter, and yes often they can also be found in schools, homes, work, church,  governments, elsewhere too.. these are people who often claim they are giving you some helpful hints, tips, advice but are trying to manipulate you to do something they rather want.   

 

 

 

 

Friendly, Friends, Soulmate, Friendship, Companion

  A good definition of a good friend is a person  who is has a mutual reciprocal relationship with you where you can ask them to do something for you and they will do it  and not say selfishly why? what is it in it for me?  as opposed to a one sided,  selfish, control freak, give me, give me, give it to me relationship.
  
(Ruth 2:13 KJV)  Then she said, Let me find favour in thy sight, my lord; for that thou hast comforted me, and for that thou hast spoken friendly unto thine handmaid, though I be not like unto one of thine handmaidens.
 
(Prov 18:24 KJV)  A man that hath friends must show himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother.
 
(Phil 2:25 KJV)  Yet I supposed it necessary to send to you Epaphroditus, my brother, and companion in labour, and fellowsoldier, but your messenger, and he that ministered to my wants.
 
(Mat 12:50 KJV)  For whosoever shall do the will of my Father which is in heaven, the same is my brother, and sister, and mother.
 
(Psa 119:63 KJV)  I am a companion of all them that fear thee, and of them that keep thy precepts.
 
(Prov 13:20 KJV)  He that walketh with wise men shall be wise: but a companion of fools shall be destroyed.
 
(Prov 28:7 KJV)  Whoso keepeth the law is a wise son: but he that is a companion of riotous men shameth his father.
 
(Prov 28:24 KJV)  Whoso robbeth his father or his mother, and saith, It is no transgression; the same is the companion of a destroyer.
 
(Mal 2:14 KJV)  Yet ye say, Wherefore? Because the LORD hath been witness between thee and the wife of thy youth, against whom thou hast dealt treacherously: yet is she thy companion, and the wife of thy covenant.
 
(Rev 1:9 KJV)  I John, who also am your brother, and companion in tribulation, and in the kingdom and patience of Jesus Christ, was in the isle that is called Patmos, for the word of God, and for the testimony of Jesus Christ.
 
(Mat 25:33 KJV)  And he shall set the sheep on his right hand, but the goats on the left.   34  Then shall the King say unto them on his right hand, Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world: 35  For I was an hungered, and ye gave me meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me in: 36  Naked, and ye clothed me: I was sick, and ye visited me: I was in prison, and ye came unto me.  37  Then shall the righteous answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungered, and fed thee? or thirsty, and gave thee drink? 38  When saw we thee a stranger, and took thee in? or naked, and clothed thee? 39  Or when saw we thee sick, or in prison, and came unto thee?  40  And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me. 41  Then shall he say also unto them on the left hand, Depart from me, ye cursed, into everlasting fire, prepared for the devil and his angels: 42  For I was an hungered, and ye gave me no meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me no drink: 43  I was a stranger, and ye took me not in: naked, and ye clothed me not: sick, and in prison, and ye visited me not. 44  Then shall they also answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungered, or athirst, or a stranger, or naked, or sick, or in prison, and did not minister unto thee? 45  Then shall he answer them, saying, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye did it not to one of the least of these, ye did it not to me. 46  And these shall go away into everlasting punishment: but the righteous into life eternal.
 
and you can see also
http://thefocusonthefamily.wordpress.com/2008/07/14/changing-yourself-first-positively/
http://thefocusonthefamily.wordpress.com/2008/07/03/verbal-abuse-is-always-unacceptable-too/
http://thefocusonthefamily.wordpress.com/2008/07/17/the-too-common-abusive-silent-treatment/
 http://postedat.wordpress.com/2008/07/07/control-freaks/
http://thenonconformer.wordpress.com/2008/06/15/bullies-free-speech/
http://postedat.wordpress.com/2008/07/21/the-pretender-imposter-wolf-in-sheep-clothing/
http://thenonconformer.wordpress.com/2008/07/21/hidden-agendas/
http://postedat.wordpress.com/2008/06/23/another-bully/
http://anyonecare.wordpress.com/2008/07/12/bad-pastors-bad-deacons-bad-elders-bad-church/
 http://postedat.wordpress.com/2008/07/25/woe-to-the-shepherds/
http://anyonecare.wordpress.com/2008/07/16/just-by-me-merely-observing/
 http://anyonecare.wordpress.com/2008/06/21/amazing/
http://anyonecare.wordpress.com/2008/06/21/equality/
http://anyonecare.wordpress.com/2008/07/03/christians-are-supposedly-to-be-different/
http://anyonecare.wordpress.com/2008/07/02/unchristian/   
 
 
  
We all do have a natural desire to be loved, accepted by others, to have good friends. and this same desire can become  misused .. false persons can misuse  it, and/or we can go overboard in our desire to please others too..
 
Now everyone should be part of a valid social network, community, have good friends, but they must also be able to live alone, to stand up for their own rights, values, respect too.
 
All persons are also still known by the company they do keep now also.
 
(Prov 22:1 KJV)  A good name is rather to be chosen than great riches, and loving favour rather than silver and gold.
 
(Eccl 7:1 KJV)  A good name is better than precious ointment; and the day of death than the day of one’s birth.
 
(1 Sam 2:26 KJV)  And the child Samuel grew on, and was in favour both with the LORD, and also with men.
 
(Est 2:17 KJV)  And the king loved Esther above all the women, and she obtained grace and favour in his sight more than all the virgins; so that he set the royal crown upon her head, and made her queen instead of Vashti.
 
(Psa 5:12 KJV)  For thou, LORD, wilt bless the righteous; with favour wilt thou compass him as with a shield.
 
(Psa 30:5 KJV)  For his anger endureth but a moment; in his favour is life: weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning.
 
(Psa 35:27 KJV)  Let them shout for joy, and be glad, that favour my righteous cause: yea, let them say continually, Let the LORD be magnified, which hath pleasure in the prosperity of his servant.
 
(Psa 44:3 KJV)  For they got not the land in possession by their own sword, neither did their own arm save them: but thy right hand, and thine arm, and the light of thy countenance, because thou hadst a favour unto them.
 
(Psa 89:17 KJV)  For thou art the glory of their strength: and in thy favour our horn shall be exalted.
 
(Psa 106:4 KJV)  Remember me, O LORD, with the favour that thou bearest unto thy people: O visit me with thy salvation;
 
(Prov 3:4 KJV)  So shalt thou find favour and good understanding in the sight of God and man.
 
(Prov 12:2 KJV)  A good man obtaineth favour of the LORD: but a man of wicked devices will he condemn.
 
(Prov 13:15 KJV)  Good understanding giveth favour: but the way of transgressors is hard.
 
(Prov 14:9 KJV)  Fools make a mock at sin: but among the righteous there is favour.
 
(Prov 14:35 KJV)  The king’s favour is toward a wise servant: but his wrath is against him that causeth shame.
 
(Prov 21:10 KJV)  The soul of the wicked desireth evil: his neighbour findeth no favour in his eyes.
 
(Prov 29:26 KJV)  Many seek the ruler’s favour; but every man’s judgment cometh from the LORD.
 
(Prov 31:30 KJV)  Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised.
 
(Eccl 9:11 KJV)  I returned, and saw under the sun, that the race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, neither yet bread to the wise, nor yet riches to men of understanding, nor yet favour to men of skill; but time and chance happeneth to them all.
 
(Isa 26:10 KJV)  Let favour be showed to the wicked, yet will he not learn righteousness: in the land of uprightness will he deal unjustly, and will not behold the majesty of the LORD.
 
(Isa 60:10 KJV)  And the sons of strangers shall build up thy walls, and their kings shall minister unto thee: for in my wrath I smote thee, but in my favour have I had mercy on thee.
 
(Luke 1:30 KJV)  And the angel said unto her, Fear not, Mary: for thou hast found favour with God.
 
(Luke 2:52 KJV)  And Jesus increased in wisdom and stature, and in favour with God and man.
 
(Acts 2:47 KJV)  Praising God, and having favour with all the people. And the Lord added to the church daily such as should be saved.
 
    

What do you do when your family is Torn Apart.

But what do you do when your family has turned their backs on you? Have you asked yourself what did you do to cause this? Do you wish that you could erase all the bad things that has happen? Can a family that has been torn apart be reconciled again?    http://www.blogtalkradio.com/Virtuous1/blog/2008/07/13/What-do-you-do-when-your-family-is-Torn-Apart